Wednesday, October 31, 2007


Witness the neighborhood teen in his Halloween costume. A year ago, when he was 12, he had a proper costume on -- SpiderMan or similar. This year, a year older, a year cooler, out with his 13-year-old buddy, he was our first trick-or-treater.

His friend at least put on a white t-shirt and greased his hair back and called himself a 'greaser'. This guy had his middle school gym tshirt, a pair of jeans, a pillow case, and an air of entitlement.

My wife and I have long been upholders of the certain Halloween rules:

1. All trick-or-treaters must say "Trick or treat" and/or "Happy Halloween." "Hello" and "how are you" are nice but are not acceptable replacements for the real deal.

2. A trick-or-treater must demonstrate, if not creativity, the willingness to go beyond a goofy hat, or in this guy's case, the extremely ordinary. [Note: While in mid sentence here a group of 12 and 13 year olds arrived. 2 were held aside for claiming to be 'pimps' because one had a hat on with a feather. The 2nd one didn't even have a hat on. A young lady was held aside because she was claiming to be 'goth'. I asked her if she was 'goth' every day and she claimed she wasn't (though her friends disagreed).]

3. If a "Thank you" is not provided, they are provided a reminder.

A trick-or-treater failing Rule 2 may opt to do a trick in order to gain their treat. Tricks are evaluated, especially in the case of teens, on the ability for a teen to embarrass themselves in front of their peers. In the case of the 13-year-old, his 'greaser' friend showed me that he could move his eyebrows up and down independently. PASSED. The plain-guy borrowed his friend's bike, did some wheelies and proceeded to fall off the bike, twisting his friend's handlebars in the process. PASSED. [The pimp boys and the goth girl noted above performed cartwheels on the dewy grass.]

Memo to myself: distribute a 'rules of Halloween' throughout the neighborhood the weekend before Halloween next year (and probably get the house egged next Mischief Night as a result).

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lame is right. What amount of chuzpah allows a kid to trick or treat without a costume?! Sheesh. Why, I wouldn't give him one skittle.

May I add a rule? It is the "don't hog the treats, leave some for others" rule.

11/01/2007 04:59:00 PM  
Blogger Kevin said...

Bravo, Sean (and Robin) for setting standards and demanding that they be met. Our nation would be a better place with more folks like ya.

11/01/2007 05:01:00 PM  
Blogger mcglinch said...

The five-finger multi-grab is just bad manners regardless of holiday. That hand should be reduced by one finger for each infraction! A finger for each excessive Mallow Cup!

11/01/2007 09:40:00 PM  
Blogger V.K. said...

oh lord, another fantastic post and commenting.

thanks for the yuks.

I actually went trick or treating. For about ten houses. With some young friends. I was a garden gnome, hat courtesy of workmates. And, I did a gnome dance at each house, and skipped up and down the drive, to earn my candy. Since I'm like, a big kid and all, ya know.

11/07/2007 11:24:00 PM  
Blogger Deborah Gamble said...

And the two-year olds that trick-or-treat at your house? Are they held to the same standard?

Actually the rules are terrific. I agree wholeheartedly!

11/07/2007 11:52:00 PM  
Blogger mcglinch said...

VK - thanks! glad you made it out and did it properly.

DG - i have never had a 2 year old show up without appropriate costume. the younger the better prepared they are -- i think it's because their parents still love them at that age.

11/08/2007 10:09:00 AM  

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